DEBBIE GIBSON!
TIFFANY!
SERPENTS!
This is a very strong contender, i feel, for the title of best film ever made in the entire history of time.
Now, i'm not saying that it's a great film, or even a good one really.
It's just that the very existence of a film wherein '80s popstrels
Debbie Gibson and Tiffany fight in a swamp... Debbie Gibson and
Tiffany... mud-wrestling... It's like someone hacked into the dreams of
my ten-year-old self and beamed them directly onto celluloid. The fact
that the movie also contains giant lizards engaged in a serpentine duel to the death is just the icing on the
cake.
Said gargantuan reptiles may not be the greatest effects committed to
film (in fact, the word "special" is possibly not applicable to these
effects), but that just enhanced the charm. Speaking of "charms", hasn't
Tiffany grown? She now resembles Karen Gillan's MILFy mother, and that
ain't no bad thing. Still more of a Gibson fan, myself, though.
Monsters, ex-teen pinups, and in-jokes galore. When the lines "I think
we're alone now..", "There doesn't seem to be anyone around!" were
uttered, i think i nearly spontaneously combusted with joy. Truly the
stuff of a madman's dreams.
I like reptiles. I'm a total herpetophile.
ReplyDeleteI was always into Tiffany back in the day myself. Though the two of them together plus mega-reptiles is awesome. Tiffany has a great rack as well.
ReplyDeleteIndeed she does. There are more movies of this ilk out there, apparently - Debbie Gibson stars in 'Mega Shark vs Giant Octopus' and 'Mega Shark vs Mecha Shark' (which obviously sounds AWESOME), and Tiffany is in one called 'Mega Piranha'. There just isn't enough time to watch all of these celluloid ribbons of dreams.
ReplyDelete